"WHAT IS THE PERFECT ENGINE?"

DOES IT'S OWN OIL CHANGE EVERY FOUR WEEKS  

1.YOUR BALD YOUR WHOLE LIFE
2.YOU HAVE A HOLE IN YOUR HEAD
3.YOUR NEIGHBOURS ARE NUTS
4.THE GUY BEHIND YOU IS AN ASSHOLE

AND MY PERSONAL FAVOURITE

5.EVERYTIME YOU GET EXCITED YOU THROW UP AND FAINT!!

I KNOW ITS SIMILAR TO THE LAST ONE BUT COULDN'T RESIST

REMEMBER !!!!!!!

"IT'S NOT WHAT YOU KNOW
OR
WHO YOU KNOW "

THAT MATTERS

" IT'S WHAT YOU KNOW ABOUT WHO YOU KNOW,
 THAT REALLY COUNTS " 

I ONLY HAVE ONE EYE

MY HAIR IS A MESS

MY NEIGHBOURS ARE NUTS

:p MY BEST FRIENDS A C T

AND TO CAP IT ALL MY OWNERS A WANKER

WHAT A LIFE

Me being of sound mind and body and in awe of the female anatomy would like to know this; and it is not my intention to be degrading in any way what-so-ever;

I for one enjoy the pleasures when a woman is smooth "and correct me if I am wrong but" I am led to beleive (not confessing anything here by the way) that it heightens sensitivity for a woman. and a vast majority of women prefer this.

Please note that this is part of a worldwide case study with great importance

So would I be right in thinking this, your comments would be much appreciated, all in-depth details welcolme

Jack

Now I'm not very politically minded, but as I have heard Tony Blair will be stepping aside shortly to allow Gordon Brown to step into his shoes.

Well !!! I am not a labour fanatic or conservative come to mind, but surely if we elected Blair into power why the fuck should Brown (who's done bugger, all except tax us to the hilt ) be allowed to run the counrty without a democratic vote.

Does anyone agree or am I talking bollocks again!!!!

How do you know when someone likes you as a friend or likes you that little bit more?

You meet someone you becomes friends, you laugh, you joke, you sense there mood swings, their despair and their joy. But how do you know?

You chat about relevant and irrelevant topics, but then wham!! They say, what at first appears to be an insignificant comment, but then the cogs in the brain start to work and you convince yourself that it means something else, but then self doubt starts!

So you pass it off that its your imagination and take no more notice>

But what if?

After a series of these comments, maybe a glance or just slightly flirtatious. HOW DO YOU KNOW WHETHER OR NOT TO MAKE A PRAT OF YOURSELF FOR THE UM'TEENTH TIME ?????????

Help please!
Why is it the more you do for a woman the less your are apprecited and what's expected of you increases?
Yet fuck me, the less you give the more you are a b'stard the more you get?

The mind boggles!!!!!!